Great day, night sucked!!
Yesterday was a pretty strong day for good things. BossMan has asked me to come back for one week to cover the office. He will fly me into Cleveland to see my family then I will drive down and stay with Flexigirl for the week. Scrapbooking galore will be going on. YEAH!!! He even cleared it with the new BossLady. Then he bought me lunch at O'Charley's so I could have my yummy Pecan Chicken Tender Salad. That was wonderful. And the day flew by. Finished work and returned to packing. Had a visit from BossMan's daughter to pick up scrapbookign stuff that I was giving her. That was a pleasurable visit. Then it was off to the airport to pick up E.
B and I waited for a half an hour at the airport for the flight to come in. It was precious to see B screaming "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!!" and run to him to be hugged and kissed but for me it was gut wrenching. It had finally hit me at that time that it was really going to happen. And I shut down. I allowed E to kiss me but it felt all wrong. We got back to the house and gave B a letter that the new house wrote to him. B was all excited about it. Then E put him down to bed trying to learn his nighttime routine. After that E wanted to cuddle into me. Something inside me will not let him near me. It may be some resentment but I am not fully sure. I felt my entire body turn to ice and it was extremely uncomfortable.
This morning was not all that much better. My escape from reality is a sleep coping mechanism. Kind of hard to do when you have to get up from work. Just still feel like a block of ice and have a horrible headache. Here is hoping that it will go away through out the day!
B and I waited for a half an hour at the airport for the flight to come in. It was precious to see B screaming "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!!" and run to him to be hugged and kissed but for me it was gut wrenching. It had finally hit me at that time that it was really going to happen. And I shut down. I allowed E to kiss me but it felt all wrong. We got back to the house and gave B a letter that the new house wrote to him. B was all excited about it. Then E put him down to bed trying to learn his nighttime routine. After that E wanted to cuddle into me. Something inside me will not let him near me. It may be some resentment but I am not fully sure. I felt my entire body turn to ice and it was extremely uncomfortable.
This morning was not all that much better. My escape from reality is a sleep coping mechanism. Kind of hard to do when you have to get up from work. Just still feel like a block of ice and have a horrible headache. Here is hoping that it will go away through out the day!
posted by Ohio Queen @ 12:51 PM
1 Comments:
At Friday, July 22, 2005,
-h. said…
Dr. Martini Says: It's seriously your body's way of coping with your loss of individuality again. You've been on your own now for what, 8 months? Now you have to share not only your "space" but you have to relinquish part of your decision making privileges to your partner. You have to "re-learn" how to live with each other again. It's a lot like you divorced but now are reconciling. Plus there's the added stress of moving to a place that's new and that's away from everyone you've known.
Give each other some leeway - it's going to be rough to adjust for everyone (B included). Just know that the stress of it all will not last forever.
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